Six weeks since my baby died

Today marks six weeks. Six weeks since Killian died. As of tomorrow, he will have been gone longer than he was here. It’s surreal. It’s raw. It opens up some of those deep wounds that had begun to start to heal. I have missed my baby longer than I didn’t. I’ve look at his pictures … Continue reading Six weeks since my baby died

Sick Kids Hospital

The nurses at Sick Kids. Say this to the parents of children who have had extended stays at the hospital, and you’ll hear a lot of the same words. Kind, dedicated, loving, family. Aside from their unbelievable knowledge and abilities, these are the qualities that make nurses so very special. And so under appreciated. These … Continue reading Sick Kids Hospital

Guilt after the death of a child

Guilt is such a powerful emotion. It can literally consume you if you let it. It will sneak up and make your stomach turn to ice. That anxious, creeping feeling makes it’s way up from your belly, through the shoulders, into your throat, and then into your head. It can literally make my lips tingle … Continue reading Guilt after the death of a child

The club no one wants to be apart of

This evening I was putting my youngest down for bed. Since I’ve been home from Toronto, he’s needed me to rock him to sleep again. Being only 2 years old, all he knew is that I was suddenly gone. And now I’m home, so he’s clinging to me like a life preserver. As I was … Continue reading The club no one wants to be apart of

When a Dad loses his child

We always talk about Moms when we talk about losing a child. How unimaginable it must be for us. It really is indescribable. Whether we had the privilege of being able to carry that baby while it grew, or we became that tiny humans Mom through another avenue, we are their Moms. Moms are often … Continue reading When a Dad loses his child